Am I Cut Out for This?
Aug 25, 2024
The 6 words that fill the minds of millions of college students. It's a normal question, asked by first year college students struggling to find their way, seniors experiencing rejection from internship or job interviews, and star students and athletes recognizing they are no longer the best.
When college kids mull over the answer, they are challenged to confront several psychological experiences: self-doubt, anxiety, and self-efficacy. For many students, it marks their first run in with an Existential Crisis: "Am I cut out for this?"
In simpliest description, an Existential Crisis is a psychological experience that challenges one to define their purpose or life meaning. That's a big decision for 18-25 year olds that requires time and consideration of a variety of factors. It's also loaded with anxiety and leaves millions of students feeling overwhelmed.
Think about it. How many occupations did you fantasize of before landing in your current job or career track? If we revisit childhood, I can name at least a dozen (including Mr. Rogers and a funeral director) before setting foot on a college campus. Even then, did you ever choose a major before your first year of college, then change it at least once while a college student? I did.
Before college I dreamed of being a real estate mogul in southern New Jersey and earning millions before age 30. Naturally I enrolled in college as a business major to fulfill this goal. Soon after starting college I encountered the question: "Am I cut out for this?" which was fueled by acknowledging that I wasn't interested in the course content, did not perform well on exams in those classes, and severely lacked motivation to do anything about my interest or performance.
Note to self: This is not a good combination when considering a college major, let alone a career path.
Albeit difficult, this is among the most common adjustment experiences when kids transition from high school to college. It is where many kids for the first time land when fantasy in high school: "I want to be a civil engineer and build bridges." meets the reality of a college engineering major: "Wow, I really hate math."
The experience serves as a reminder: college is filled with unlimited opportunites for self-discovery, and often discovery is uncomfortable.
Here's the good news. Working through this existential crisis also provides an opportunityt to gain clarity. Let's face it, people gravitate toward things they find interesting, are good at, and are motivated to work on. So if your college kid is struggling with the question "Am I cut out for this?," normalize that struggle and encourage them to seek out the answers.
Clarity is a good thing. The process will bring them closer to discover their true interests, strengths, and work ethic. Best of all, working through the discomfort and gaining clarity will help increase their confidence in addressing subsequent, expected, existential crises. Especially the one that most of us are trying to answer: "Who am I?"
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